Your bibles are burning in the heat of your hate,
You can’t spell supremacy
Yet I am supposed to look to you for direction,
Where are you going?
How great can you be if you have to oppress others to stand out?
What purpose do you serve?
What value do you bring?
Oh yes, you thrive in ignorance
You’re a master,
But you are scared
So you project your insecurities on me,
You try to devalue my existence
by calling me names
but you know what
I don’t care.
I don’t care what you think
Really I don’t,
You don’t know me,
You can’t understand me
You don’t define me,
So pour out your hate
It falls on deaf ears,
My greatness can’t be covered by your hate,
You don’t matter,
Go to your corner and scream all you want,
No one is listening,
The past couple of days I have been wrestling with a thought. The thought is why do black people value the opinions of white supremacist so much. There are so many derogatory words that affect us.
To name a few.
The thing is I know I am not a monkey or nigger or a boy why do I allow those words to trigger me to lose my mind. Who is empowering the words the ignorant person saying them or me the person receiving it? I feel that white people that resort to using these words know how it affects us and how it brings the worst in us. They win through our reaction. They win by us drawing attention to their ignorance. We can call a white person “cracker” and whatever names we have for them but it does not have the same effect on them that their words have on us. They created words that boxed us in and keep us distracted from how great we are. We can’t control what they think or what they say but we can change how it affects us. We can stop allowing others to take our power from us. We are powerful and there is nothing they can do to stop us. Yes, there is white privilege and entitlement. Just being white in our society has its privileges. There was a thought in the times of slavery that the wealthy would cause a divide between poor white people and black people by saying at least you are not black. So white privilege is not some thing you earn it is something you are born into. Even white privilege can’t stop us.
My thought to people of color is. We are great. There is nothing wrong with our lips, our thighs, our complexion, we are handsome, beautiful and intelligent. We are uniquely made and we don’t take a backseat to anyone. We don’t need validation from white people to be great. We are great. It does not matter if you are rich or poor, educated or uneducated you have a purpose in this world and nothing can stop you from expressing it but you. When I look at my kids I don’t ever want them to feel inferior because they are black. They have nothing to prove and neither do you. The word n*gger has no power until you give it power. Don’t let that word define you. You know it is not who you so don't let it rule or ruin your life….
I am not dismissing the effects words like n*gger have on black culture. Words matter but I am expressing that words power come from your reaction to them. What will happen when we stop reacting to the words of people that hate us without even knowing us. The only way we can eliminate the n*gger from our dictionary is by taking its power away. It is a word with no meaning; no value. Yes some white people believe we have no value and no meaning to live in this world. We don’t have to do anything for them to hate us and that can hurt but if they don’t love us we still need to love ourselves. They don’t matter more than you do. Your life has meaning because you make it have meaning. Call me what you want but it won’t change who I am. I am not a n*gger. My life has meaning and I won’t let you be the excuse of why I won’t live my life to it fullest. Your ignorant, limited word for me dies today.
Do I really want God's help?
The obvious answer is yes, yet my actions don't always align with my beliefs. I act alone, not even considering God in my plans. God is an afterthought until things fall apart. Then God gets the blame for my faith not being validated. It is like getting mad at a friend because you got in a car accident but they didn't even ride with you.
It is so easy to get caught up in what you do that you don't realize that you are ignoring the One that gave you the inspiration. We can make the excuse that we are too busy but we make time take "selfies". We have plenty of time for what we view as important yet we say God is the most important thing in our life. We don't want to miss out on anything but having a deeper more intimate relationship with God. Our "selfies" become our idol that keep us from seeing God's presence working through our life. God is with us but we don't know it and because of our ignorance we can't appreciate Him.
I don't want to be ashamed of God. I don't want to live with God out of the picture. I don't just want God's help, I want His presence. I want to walk with God. I want to talk to God. I want to be a part of God's life. I don't have all the answers and that is okay; God does. I don't know how my life will turn out but God does. I want to be fully integrated in God's plan. Honestly I don't know how I can change how I have been without God's help. I need God every step of the way.
God I just want to be a part of your picture.