Until yesterday I had been struggling with stress for a long time. No matter where I turned stress met me. Yesterday I was driving and was asking God what is wrong with me. I didn't want to be stressed out but it seemed to have a hold of me. I wanted to be free from it all. What I realized is I was trying to control my life. I was trying to make things happen without asking for help. In my pride I was keeping peace at bay. I was fighting against what I wanted most in my life: love.
Stress caused me to have a negative outlook on life and because of my negative energy I attracted more of what I did not want into my atmosphere. I created a prison cell and locked away my joy, peace and love. Guarding it day and night not allowing them to see the light of day. I wanted things to work so bad that I forgot I took the enjoyment out of my journey. I wanted to get to point B fast and was not willing to stop and enjoy the sunset. My life was in darkness and I was unhappy because I kept bumping into things. Upset because things were in my way, ignorant to the reality that I was in the way. I was blocking anyone in my life from being free to be themselves. I was controlling the light switch and was unwilling to let anyone see the Son. Thank God for awareness. When God opens the blinders and you see life as it really is, the negativity flees and all that remains is love. That is what God has done for me. He has let me see the light, not to show me how miserable I have been - that was self evident. He just loves, and in that unconditional love, I found hope, peace and passion attached to my purpose. I am excited. Regardless of the adversity that comes, I have peace that God will handle it. I don't have to worry, I don't have to try, I can just be. I can embrace reality with open arms. The word that stands out in the scripture above is: let. God is willing to rule our hearts with love and peace but will I let Him? Today, I will! Until next time...
1 Comment
11/1/2017 10:28:49 am
Love is such a complicated thing. I understand every word you said. I know that there are times when you will feel alone, especially when you are surrounded by your friends who have their own relationships. But I realized that I do not want to be in a relationship just because I feel left out. I want to be with someone when the right time comes. Because love is all about waiting for that one person who will love you wholeheartedly.
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